I must be a bad influence: another former student of mine is in trouble with the law -- not just the locals, but maybe the feds. Mark R. Walker, 25, is charged with making a false report to authorities, even though he didn't make any report to authorities, after a false bomb threat closed down Madison's Wells Fargo Bank and the post office Wednesday afternoon. Here are the going press accounts:
- "Madison Man Charged with False Reporting to Police," KJAMRadio, 2007.12.20
- "Bomb Threat Made at Wells Fargo Bank," KJAMRadio.com, 2007.12.20
- Chuck Clement, "Madison Man Accused of Making Bomb Threat," Madison Daily Leader, 2007.12.20.
KJAM says Walker told a Wells Fargo teller that the package he was carrying contained a bomb. The teller then saw Walker leave and walk toward the post office. Walker evidently did take the package to the post office and hand it over to be mailed. None of the press accounts suggest that he said the word "bomb" or made any other threatening moves at the post office: according to MDL, postal workers didn't know anything was up until Madison police came to the post office and asked if Walker had mailed a package.
That timeline could be important: if Walker didn't make any threat or comment at the post office itself, he might be able to evade federal charges, which postal inspector Adel Valdes says they are looking into.
Now the Madville Times didn't have the good fortune of being at the bank or post office to get evacuated, and we haven't had the pleasure of a chat with Mark recently. However, knowing Mark, and knowing bank tellers, we can easily imagine the following scenario:
- Mark walks into Wells Fargo to get some cash to pay for postage for the Playstation DCI eventually found with their x-ray machine in the package of concern.
- Cheerful teller, happily processing his request, makes the marketing small talk tellers are trained to make in order to make banking a cozy emotional experience and thus improve bank profits by 0.93%. (Their chitter-chatter can get a little out of hand: one day a bank teller, handling a deposit for me, asked what the folks who'd written the check were paying me for. I just smiled.) The teller asks, "Oh, so what's in the package?"
- Mark, intolerant of empty social gestures, thinks to himself that he doesn't want to be rude and say, "None of your damn business."
- Mark, unfortunately also a smart aleck, instead says, "Oh, it's a bomb."
- Madison enjoys a slight uptick in sales tax revenue as Sioux Falls Police, ATF, DCI, and probably a couple secret Homeland Security agents come to Madison for a quick x-ray and supper.
You know I think you're an o.k. guy, Mark, but I guess I should have made this clear in English class, too: No matter how silly the bank teller's question is, you don't say bomb. You don't say bombastic. You don't say bombardier jacket. There are better ways to boost Madison's publicity and tourism revenue. And one smart aleck comment is not worth jail.
Well, there our quixotic shout-out to the little guy for the day -- back to the news! (And I'll let you know if ATF, DCI, or DHS comes to chat with me about my association with such nefarious characters.)
Anybody with half a brain cell would never say the word "bomb" in a bank or anywhere else. Especially at this time of high stress with the holidays, the financial, family pressure and hurried attitude everyone has, not to mention Homeland Security awareness. Anyway, he is innocent of a crime until proven guilty, but in the court of public opinion, he's been convicted of stupidity already. DUH!
ReplyDeleteMadville you must be insane to think that what he did was ok and what the teller did was wrong. Sounds like you need to know the whole story before passing judgement on somebody for their actions. If I remember right wasn't he the same person that caused a scare at the high school with another bomb threat several years ago. Maybe he has something wrong with him and needs to seek some help. Put yourself in the shoes of the teller. Obviosuly in your own words he wasn't getting a good return on his investment. But after causing a problem would you go back to the same bank again the day after you caused the problem. I wouldn't but he did. It seems that he lacks some common sense to know the difference between right and wrong.
ReplyDeleteMischief, malicious or otherwise, has been turned into "terrorism" by the creeping insanity polluting the landscape from the Bush administration and gutless Congress Critters. There are apparently a few thousand new bureaucrats who have nothing to do or at least can't find anything significant to do.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, does anybody really think that somebody with an actual bomb in a package is going to discuss it with anybody unless he or she is at the point of using it or exploiting it?
But, like keeping your hands on top of the steering wheel when some semi-brain dead law enforcement office notices you have an out-of-county license plate, it is not smart to ever say anything some clerk can misinterpret as anything other than "hello, have a nice day".
Bush insanity will destroy normal conversation in public places.
Anon9:10 -- um, where did I say what he did was o.k.? Feel free to clarify your own story as well; you kind of lost the thread midway. And give Anon1:34 a read for the bigger picture.
ReplyDeleteRead the law. Causing a false report to be made also constitutes false reporting.
ReplyDeleteAnon10:37--Do you refer to SDCL 22-11-9? "...intentionally causes the transmission of a report..." -- if I'm Walker's lawyer, I argue he didn't intentionally cause any report. He didn't say, "I have a bomb and I want you to call the police." He didn't intend to cause a report... or at least the prosecution has the burden to prove that he did. A lawyer's go to have something to argue.
ReplyDeleteBut Walker doesn't have the money for good lawyering, so if the reported particulars are true, he'll get some free room and board from us for a while.
But indulge me, Anon10:37, in an extreme hypothetical: Suppose I get angry on these pages (and I do, sometimes) and write something that makes you think, "Man, Heidelberger's so mad, he sounds like he's going to go blow something up. I'd better call the police." Who gets busted for false reporting, me or you?
From Anon 10:37-
ReplyDeleteIf somebody tells another person "I have a bomb," the person who says this should reasonably expect that the person hearing those words would make a report to law enforcement, thus, intentionally causing a false report to be made. In this circumstance, the person making this report better hope to catch the court in a good mood, because this is a big deal and a very wrong act.
He's lucky he's not charged with a felony-check SDCL 22-14A-25.
Also, to answer your question, check SDCL 22-14A-27.
ReplyDeleteI'll spare your time. YOU DO!
ReplyDelete